Following my last blog post, I have been chatting to my holiday friends. We had such a great time.. “this time last week we were….” conversations have featured predominantly. We have already started to plan a reunion night out and I mentioned how the holiday has made me more determined to enhance my non-existent social life and to enjoy meeting up with friends. One of the girls then suggested I go on to a dating site. She said friends of hers are having regular dates, were having fun and had a real social life now. “It doesn’t need to be serious. Go out there to have fun and meet new people. You need to live.”
So, inspired by her words and despite my reservations, I have done it. I signed up to match.com yesterday. Less than 24 hours later and I’m ready to come off again. Here are the issues:
- I’m punching above my weight. The men that I am attracted to (even the ones around my age) want slim, athletic, previously unmarried women with no children. No, no, no and no again.
- I have become that shallow, fickle person who will not look at their profile unless I find them attractive. This is despite the fact that I know people look different in real life, that personality can make an attractive man ugly, and that I hope men aren’t doing the same to me.
- A lot of the photos are ridiculous anyway: naked chest shots; lying in bed shots; sunglasses shots; moody-trying-to-be-sexy shots. These are narrowing my field somewhat.
- I can’t bring myself to put a picture in yet, for one reason and one reason only. I don’t want people I know (including work colleagues and pupils) to know I am on there. Don’t ask me why, most people do it or have done it these days.
- I am not sure about this enough to pay. So far I have not had any contacts. Might be because I have no picture. Might be because I am separated with three children and I am ‘curvy’. Might be because I have to pay to use most of the features! I’m matchless.
- Everytime my phone beeps I think someone has messaged me. They haven’t. This is not good for my temperamental nerves.
- I keep obsessively going through my matches (which I am not convinced are matches if they want slim, athletic unmarried etc) as if I am going to find my soul mate stating back at me. No, no, no!
So there you have it . Maybe I am just not ready. Maybe I am expecting too much. Any advice, anyone?