He is taunting me. He sits there, smugly mimicking me with his expressionless, emotionless face.
Apart from getting up with my children and then later to check on my dad, I have been in bed all day. I told myself that I was just going back to ‘get warm’ (we have no heating until the fire is built) but each time I have found my eyes drooping and then have dozed.
I have ignored the vibrations of my activity tracker, the seated man taunting me repeatedly as I lay inactive in my bed.
Work has played on my mind most of all, but also the things that I had planned today. I have accomplished nothing.
As my sister said, in the short history of this depressive episode, this is the first time I have spent all day in bed. One day. Hopefully the last. And if it isn’t? This article may help:
https://www.blurtitout.org/2017/09/21/depression-wont-let-us-out-of-bed/
Tomorrow, I plan to laugh in the face of the seated man.