The alternative path

Whilst I must walk between two paths when Wild Card is concerned, my last post did not detail the situation with Second.

It’s equally going well. And, equally, there have been more ‘serious’ conversations.

He’s certainly more reserved and careful with his feelings. However he texts every day and every night when he finishes work. He’s sweet and funny. We get on really well.

Before Wild Card, he was certainly the front runner. Now it’s just complicated.

The biggest issue is I am unclear how there could be a future. He has two children and has just bought a house. He is five hours away.

From knowing him, I believe him when he says travel is not an issue for him. He travels a lot.

But like Wild Card, as my feelings develop through our daily chats I can’t help but project forward.

I can imagine being with him and the life we could have, and I like it. We have similarities in ‘culture’ and upbringing.

So, for that reason he is not just a flirtation or a bit of fun. He’s a man whom I want to get know, despite the distance and complications.

How did I get myself in this situation?!

Keep walking, keep looking, keep learning. Don’t take anything for granted and take my time.

Anything can happen in this life. Fear is not going to stop me.

At any point, either one may disappear. At any point, a man may walk into my life that mens I shun all others. Or I might get bored of the drama and complicated feelings (probably not). So for now, I’m going to keep enjoying myself, be true to myself and try very hard to keep my whole self in the present.