Day 14 – last

So, this is my last day.

I had a moment of shock yesterday when I realised the time of my flight, the 2.5 hours I needed to be there before my flight and the hour needed to get to the airport. Tomorrow, then, I will leave his home at 11.30am. In my head, I had the whole morning and early afternoon with him. Damn 24 hour clock.

He looked at me and said that I was acting like this was the final time I would be here. I can’t deny a part of me worries about that, like a part of me worries about every last scenario. What a waste of energy. If only I knew how to stop it. After 41 years, I still have no idea.

Today when Wildcard comes home from work, we may go out. He has talked of us going to a local beauty spot or maybe to the nearest city. I’m happy with both or either. I just want to be with him.

Disappointingly, neither of us woke early enough for our morning cuddle. He came in to my room, late for work, and gave me hasty kisses on my lips and neck, cold from the water he had used to wash. A missed opportunity. Hopefully not the last.

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