I feel sad today. Why I can’t enjoy my last four days off with out thinking of going back to work, I dont know. It is hanging over me like a very black cloud. I like being a teacher. I enjoy working with young people. I love seeing them develop and grow and know that […]

Intimacy: part two

He was pretty drunk by this point – certainly more than me. I’m not sure how it happened as such but soon we were hugging. I know he instigated it. He started to talk and I felt that he was having his turn to talk about his feelings. Trying anyway – for whatever reason, he […]

Intimacy: part one

I dragged myself out of bed on Saturday. I’d had a good week: another successful camping trip to a beautiful spot in Morecambe Bay: Waking up to views of sea, sand and mountains is pretty unbeatable. We came home Friday and that evening I went to the wedding reception of a good friend. It was […]


Your stone- Like fallen soldiers, Lost heroes- Lies in dismay: Dislodged from home And yet sitting in your shadow. Others, raped, Nestle against grey stones walls Or prop up metal fences. Trees – now friendly neighbours who Keep you company as the wind blows Through abandoned doorways – Once pulled you apart As roots invaded […]


Although I only published ‘Green Goddess’ this morning, I actually wrote it a few days ago. What a difference a few days make. Today, I just want to hide away. I could quite happily sit on the couch, wrap myself in a duvet and ignore the world. I feel exhausted. I don’t want to do […]

Green Goddess

I read a blog recently which spoke of the benefits of being outdoors- in particular, walking through the forest: forest therapy. It’s been so long since my friend and I had been on one of our adventures. We were both mourning the loss without knowing it…we had both had periods of depression and/or anxiety in […]

Forgive me

I’ve been wanting to write all day. I said I wouldn’t write about him anymore but I can’t help it. Thoughts have been invading my head all day. They swirl in and out of my consciousness. I can tell you with all honesty that I don’t want to think about him any more. I’m so […]

Clarity in the cold light of day

It is barely 6am. I am sat outside in my Pj’s, a fleece hoodie and my walking boots. I was tired of teetering on the edge of a single air bed, worrying about where my hands were and where his body was in comparison to mine .. I want to tell you that I had […]


Just a quick report.. I am at camp whilst the others have gone to the stage for the last song of a great band. I can report that Lost Soul is up to his old tricks: Talking about other women – check Reminiscing about the past – check Reminding me about times we were intimate […]